Like, Oh My Gawd, Like

We're, like, totally awesome. BFF 4 EVA. Hell yeah.

As I was combing through mounds of crap accumulated from eons ago this past weekend, what I came across was nothing short of amusing - my old HS journal. Even though it only contained three measly entries, it was more than enough to have me rolling on the floor with laughter (ROFL, for old time's sake). It wasn't so much the content, but the Jappy-Long-Island-tone. I have included excerpts from the journal for your enjoyment.

certain names have been omitted for anonymity sake, all others (including grammatical and spelling mistakes) have been kept in its original form

****************
March 24, 1998
Dear Diary,
Boy... *sigh* ... what a day! So tired yet at the same time, I was a hyper this morning. I meaning, so much is going on Today, me and ##### got into one of those "mother-of-all" fights. It's like WW III! Okay, so here's the story, #####'s bra was unhooked by this mother-of-all-pervert, Mike Goldmocker, and when ##### told Mike to hook it up for her, he felt her up! Now that is just sad, I mean like, Mike can't find another girl to feel up but her?! Okay, let's not be mean here, but since ##### "was" one of my best friend, I went up to Mike and was like "I heard what happened, keep ur hands to urself!" That's all I said and he just, like, played dumb. I was like "whatever" and left...##### found out and blew up in my face, but I really dont' care, I mean, I don't really wana be friends with her anymore. She gets on my nerves a lot, always making me carry her guilt trips. Today, I was just like whatever & we're not friends!
PS - I think Tanya likes me.

****************
July 13, 2000
Dear Diary,
What a day. Camp's awesome. This kid, Andrew Lynch, is the most adorable kid in the world. I love that kid so much. Anyway, the purpose of this entry is b/c of hate and anger. My ##### is the biggest BITCH in the world....Let me tell you about what happened today ~
at like 8:00pm or something, Judy, Vicky, Stephanie and I went to hang out and stuff. So to be like whatever, I told them that I was tired and I wanted to get home, so I called. My stupid ##### picked up the fuckin' phone and was lke blah blah blah blah I don't want you to hang out with friends on weeknights b/c of camp. that gets me so madd fuckin' bitch who the fuck does she thinks she is fuckin' asshole. I hate her. She never lets me out. She's the devil and she is hell. That's why I'm not afraid of hell b/c I live IN HELL. Anyway, I'm tellin' her that I'm not taking the job the "counselor" is offering me.

PS - I HATE HER

**************************************************************************

Yeah, like, I'm so glad I don't, like, talk, like that anymore. It's, like, totally embarrassing. Totally. Okie I'm outty.

DC Homecoming

After 3 years of living the suburban lifestyle, we have finally made the decision to get the hell out of here. Actually, this decision was pretty much 3 years in the making - We always just talk about it and never really put those words into action. Finally tired of complaining about it, we decided to do something about it so after Thanksgiving '06, we went house hunting and have found the perfect place. After having moved 4 or 5 times while in college, I should have known finding the perfect place was the easy part; the hard part is packing, and the hardest part is throwing enough stuff out to fit in our new, 1-bedroom, apartment.

We always knew going into this, we would be trading space for location, I mean, come on, we're moving back into DC, we were more than willing to do this tradeoff. But, instead of a 2-bedroom like we have now, we are moving into a 1-bedroom unit, which, honestly, is not all that bad considering we rarely ever use our guestroom. It is located on one of the best streets in DC and we are more than thrilled to move. Our official move in is next Friday, Feb. 2nd. Excited, yes, exhausted, that too!

Now we're just trying to pack up 3 years of crap and condensing it into one 10' U-Haul truck and a small SUV. This is what our current beautiful apartment has turned into:

What our beautifully decorated living room turned into...


Another view of this atrocity


This was once a gorgeous bedroom..hard to imagine

But, I keep telling myself that it is for the best - We are moving into one of the most exciting cities on the East Coast! Please check out my website for more pictures if you are interested! Link is provided to the right of this website under "Links".


For more pictures, go see the Photo Section of my Website

Proud Brother of an Independent Sister

Recently, Teresa had the opportunity to leave the prying and always vigilant eyes of my parents and live on her own while she's doing an internship with Disney for 5 months down in Orlando. She left this past Monday and is having the time of her life (the good and the bad). From not having to pay for anything while living at home to paying rent, grocery, school supplies and such on a monthly basis is quite the jump; and she's learning that money does not grow on trees; a hard lesson I learned after leaving college.

Teresa now has to work at Disney and really account for every penny that comes in and goes out so that she has enough money at the end of the day to feed her belly (it's a paid internship, and her housing gets deducted right from her paycheck). I can completely sympathize.

I remember back in those days when I was working at our local video rental store and Jonathan was AU's equivalent of a meter maid. We were both making minimum wage ($8/hours) and, often times, after rent, utilities and transportation, we barely had any money left for groceries. For almost six months to a year, we were eating nothing but rice from the Chinese supermarket (we had to take a bus there, and often times, we had to wait over an hour on our return trip in the freezing cold). On a good week, we would go to Safeway and get a tomato and an onion, cook it with soy sauce and that would be the topping on our rice; otherwise, we would just have rice with onions and soy sauce since onions are cheap. Jonathan had to take the bus, instead of the metro, to work to save money. A normal 30 minute trip on the metro is stretched to an unimaginable 2 hours just for one way with a transfer at Friendship Heights and another 10-15 minute walk to the AU Shuttle stop where Jonathan had to hop on to get to the main campus, which took another 15 minutes, provided that the shuttle is there at the time of his arrival. Luckily for me and for us, I could walk to my video store; which was only a few blocks down from where we live (the video store is no longer in business). Because we were so poor, we had to rent out our second bedroom and, at any point, a couple is living with another person, it never fares out well for either party, and we endured all this until the winds of change came sweeping through our front door. After a year of what I can only call a humbling experience, I landed a job at the Associated Press and quickly worked my way up the corporate latter. Jonathan worked really hard and relocated to the AU Library where two years of hard work got him the promotion to be their in-house graphic designer. Even though money is not an issue for us any longer and we're able to buy anything and everything that we want and still have money to save at the end of the month into our many savings accounts, we will never forget what we have gone through to get here. That experience helped mold me into the person I am today, and Jonathan, through it all, the good or the bad, has always been there to be my ground to keep me strong and collected.

Teresa, if you're reading this, at any point when you leave the house and live on your own, it is always a humbling experience, but it is with these humbling experiences that you build character and find out really what you're made of. In times of hardship, true character shows, so take this wonderful opportunity and run with it. Like I tell you time and time again, do everything with confidence and always with an open mind. Trust me, everything will come out golden! We're Lee's for goodness sake; nothing stops us! We will ALWAYS get what we want!!

Happy New Year to all....

And to all a good night!

Christmas

While you're trying to hammer out details come January 2nd (Jeanne), I am frantically seeking the perfect gifts for the Holidays and a week before Christmas is probably the worst time to do so. I have never put forth so much elbow grease (and elbows) into fighting my way through the crowd just to get into Burberry or Banana Republic and not have anything for myself to show for afterwards (and yes, I am extremely selfish). I despise Christmas and everything that goes along with it, i.e. Christmas shopping. But then come Christmas day, I might sing a different tune, however, that largely depends on what gifts (yes, plural) are under the tree for me this year.

Bah humbug I say....

But alas, I am completely finished with my Christmas shopping, and hopefully, from now until Christmas, it's smooth sailing from here.

I do have another day at the office tomorrow to weather through, however.... *Sigh* Ho, ho, ho to me

Ignorant Assholes

So this morning, as I was happily walking to get breakfast with my coworker, Frances, we were accosted by a dirty black guy asking us for change. Here's how the conversation went:

Black Dude: "Do you have some spare change"

Me: "No"

Black Dude: "Do you speak English?"

Me: "WHAT?!"

Black Dude: "DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?" (all loud)

ME: "FUCK YOU, yes!"

Black Dude: "You should go back to your own country."

Before I had a chance to speak
Frances: "Why don't you go get a job; you're the one asking for change, ASSHOLE."

End Scene.

I find this scenario hilarious but very irritatingly familiar because ever since I came to DC 6 years ago, I have been accosted many times with unsolicited comments, usually presumptions about my sexuality often times based on how I am dressed and, unsurprisingly, they have all been from black people, or African Americans, if you want to be PC. Though I have many presumptions about black people (growing up in a predominantly Asian household, it's hard not to have been instilled without certain prejudices especially when those judgments are confirmed daily either on your nightly 10 o'clock news or in your every day New York Times), I do not feel the need to shout out "nigger" or "welfare recipient" 0r "theif" every time one crosses my path; I save those for my weekly KKK meetings (kidding).

It used to bother me because I don't say anything back out of fear, but in recently months, my mouth has a mind of its own and it simply can't stand that kind of injustice. Perfect example for which I am totally proud of:

Scenario - downstairs in the Metro at Tenleytown after a day of shopping by myself

Black Dude (with his girlfriend): "Faggot"

Me: "I'm sorry, what the fuck did you just say?"

Black Dude: "You heard me"

Me: "Yes, but I prefer you say it to my face like a man"

Black Dude: "Faggot"

Me: "Well, unlike you, at least my mother didn't raise me on food stamps and welfare checks."

Metro doors open, and I give him the finger.

End Scene.

I hate ignorant people.

House Hunting...

Sucks my ass...yet, it is intrigueing at the same time. The ability to see all these different houses and all the opportunities to judge another man purely based on his ability (or inability for most cases here in DC) to decorate is pure entertainment. The crappy, shitty part is having to walk from one open house to the next; walking, clearly, does not suit my personality or my clothes.

Jonathan and I have long made the decision to move out of our 2 BR Rockville dwelling and back into the land of civilization; but before two months ago, this decision had been more of a dream rather than a tangible action. We have always said, "yeah, it would be nice not to sway back and forth 8 hours a week just commuting to and from work", and "it would be nice not to have to sit in a crowded subway car smelling the occassional wafts of bad odor eminating from some gym bunny too scared to take a shower at the gym fearing that he might have a 'gay' moment or, worse, being checked out by a 'homo'". But something, I have yet to figure out what, prompted us to move and, for once, to do what we had said we were going to do.

So as the journey begins, I have to say, "Thank f-ing God for Craigslist." This man, "Craig", and his "list" both should win a Nobel Prize in every and all catagory because it is just that awesome. Not only does this Craig character has a list full of up-to-date real estate listings, but also a section on Used Funitures, Cars for Sale, Rants and Raves, and my favorite, Casual Encounters for Men Seeking Women, Women Seeking Men, Women Seeking Women and Men seeking Men. It is wonderful; why? Because it is pure trash and entertainment - It's better than reading a romance novel. What Danielle Steele calls a "throbbing member needing attention" turns to "big hard cock needs sucking and swallowers step to the front of the line," yes, it is that classy. I always find it so entertaining to go through those listings advertising their privates (and yes, they have pictures now of their "throbbing members") and sharing their newly contracted STDs with their fellow mates. My personal favorite is "Cocksucker needed. If chemisty is right, prefer to bareback. Disease Free and U B 2". Okay, let's dissect this entry for a minute. "Cocksucker needed", sure, that's pretty self-explanatory; he's a little horny and he needs his dick sucked by a willing mouth. Fine. "If the chemisty is right, prefer to bareback. Disease free and U B 2" is the part that I'm having a hard time with. For those of you who are not down with the "gay-lingo", barebacking means fucking without a condom. That's fine, some people are into that, but don't tell me that you are disease free and that I have to be, too. What?! Are people serious with that crap? Hmm, I think I'll get AIDS today, I think I have an hour to kill for lunch, why don't you host an AIDS feast. I'm sorry, no rubby, no touchy; that's my rule. Besides, I don't enjoy being called a "cocksucker". I know who I am, but the world doesn't have to know I'm a fellacio freak; thanks, but no thanks.

But I've digressed. Craigslist is amazing and Jonathan and I have applied to one stellar place, and I say stellar because this apartment is located on 17th St. in Dupont where it is gay central, and even that is the understatement of the century - On the same street, you have three gay bars, three gay clubs, homo-galore, and lots of trannies; it's like Chelsea, but not as chic and minus the fishy smell.

Well, that's all for today. If you haven't checked out Craigslist, do so. They may even have a Craigslist for your city. Horray for trash.

Soy is for Sissies

Okay, being Asian, I know the importance of the product, soy, in our diet; it's what keeps Asians skinnier, healthier and, for the lack of a better word, superior than our non-Asian brethren. However, allegedly, soy is also the cause of why Asians are so "feminine" and the reason why I, apparently, am gay.... someone should tell my parents that being gay is neither a choice nor is it hereditary - it's, in fact, dietary.

People are sooooo special....

http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=53327

Holiday Break

Well, it's been a while since I last posted something and even now, I do not have really anything to report...and it's probably a good thing because that means my life is sailing on smoothly.

Jonathan and I just finished a crazy, whirlwind weekend with the family for Thanksgiving and I must say, as exhausting as it was, every ounce of effort we poured into it was worth it, a hundred times over; and I would do it again in a heartbeat. There's no better luxury than the luxury of having family around - Jonathan and I had a blast.

Thanksgiving has and will always be my favorite holiday of the year, hands down, with Christmas in a close second – it is a time to give thanks, appreciate those around you, and is especially a time when family members can get together and enjoy a night of bicker-less fun and that is exactly what we did this Thanksgiving.

Jonathan's mother, Lisa, eldest brother, Eric, and his wife, Sara, along with their cousin, Julie, came to celebrate Thanksgiving with us in DC this year; it is always a hoot when all of us get together. Wednesday night we went to dinner at Zaytinya, our favorite restaurant, where we sampled some of the finest Mediterranean foods DC has to offer. We drank and laughed and caught up and then drank some more. Thursday morning, at the ungodly hour of 5:00am, I was up and ready to meet up with Eric, Sara, and Julie for the Thanksgiving Trot for Hunger 5K race down by the memorials. I lost to Eric, and...that's that.

Rushing home to cook dinner, I was told later on that I had missed out on a great breakfast at the Hilton, which apparently had cost them an arm and a leg; but I was assured that it was worth it.

Jonathan and I have no experience whatsoever with cooking a turkey. For the past two years, our Thanksgiving turkey has always been catered from Safeway. I don't know how I feel about taking two days off just to cook a turkey when there are so many other options around to take advantage of, so this year, to do it up a little, we decided to have the turkey catered from Neiman Marcus (who knew, right?!). The turkey came out FANTASTIC, to say the least.

We had an overabundance of food - NM Turkey, Tynika's famous Mac and Cheese, Jonathan's Mash Potatoes, Cranberry sauce, Cornbread, Stuffing, Homemade Apple Pie, Homemade Cheese Cake, Homemade Chocolate Truffles (Jonathan was my saving grace this Thanksgiving) and my Green Bean Casserole and homemade gravy. it was to die for.
Oh and of course, the company was great too. Aside from the family, we had Tommy (a family friend), Javi (one of my best friends) and his friend, Shaunte (who's white, by the way...go figure) and with 10 people at the feast, we still have a ton of food leftover. If I never see another turkey as long as I shall live, it would still be too soon!
To make up for the lack of Thanksgiving preparation, I decided to host a formal dinner for the family Friday night and I must say, I am quite proud with the turnout.

I started out the dinner with the 1st course of Cream of Porcini Soup, followed by the 2nd and 3rd course of Proscuitto-wrapped Scallops and Ahi Tuna Tartar with Sesame Asparagus Vinaigrette paired with a bottle of German medium-bodied Riesling. For the main course, I did it up with the Beef Wellington served with Garlic and Herb Broiled Tomatoes paired with a bottle of 2003 Chianti from Tuscany and to finish it off, I made, and this I am EXTREMELY proud of, the Lemon Cloud Tart with Strawberry Compote and everything from the crust to the compote were all made from scratch!! Oh it was heaven, and I must say, my guests were phenomenal considering I was an hour late serving dinner. Ooops.

And last but not least, how can I forget the Wii, the much sought after game console that entertained my guests for hours on end during this vacation.

For those of you who have never heard of the Wii, here is a little background information. Unlike convention game consoles, gamers don't just sit on their lazy butts and merely pushing buttons to get the characters to move left, punch right, or drop kick to the moon. The Wii is so much more than that. It is a game system that gives the focus and attention back to the family because it has something for everyone and it is interactive - to play tennis, you hold the Wii "remote" in hand as if you were really holding a tennis racquet and swing to hit the ball and twist the remote to give it a top spin. Same goes with boxing - thrusting your hand at the TV allows you to sucker punch your opponent, so on and so forth. It is quite a novel invention and I, for one, am in love with my Nintendo Wii. If you have the time to check out my website, under videos, you can find a wonderful demonstration from this trip ;)

This was, by far, the best Thanksgiving I have ever had in a long time, and I have to say, it couldn't have come at a better time.

To those of you whom I didn't get a chance to see this Thanksgiving, I send my love and thanks for always being there no matter the distance; you are continuously in my thoughts. To the people I was able to celebrate it with, I thank you for making this the best Thanksgiving ever.

Happy Holidays everyone.

Score for the Gays

Guess where that finger has been?

From the Washington Express (Washington Post) this morning:

Evangelical Leader Resigns Over Gay Sex Allegations
Colorado Springs, CO.
The leader of the influential National Association of Evangelicals, a vocal opponent of the drive fro same-sez marriage, resigned Thursday after being accused of paying for sex with a man. The Rev. Ted Haggard also stepped aside as head of his 12,000-member New Life Church while a church panel investigates. The investigation came after a 49-year-old man told a Denver radio station that Haggard paid him to have sex. (AP)

Ohhhh, you know what they say? Homophobia stems from latent homosexual tendencies.

For more reading on this juicy, juicy victory, head to the New York Times at:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/11/03/us/03minister.html?ref=us

And for an example of this gay ass on television, head to:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6rSjrBhUIA&eurl=

This one's good; you don't want to miss the transcript of his trifling voicemails:
http://www.boingboing.net/2006/11/03/voice_mails_are_from.html

And another entry by CNN:
http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/11/03/haggard.allegations/index.html

Homo say what? Nothing? Oh yeah, that's right, you got busted! And not in the good, euphoric, white knuckle, heavy-breathing kind of way.

Another Ignorant Shithead

What the fuck is wrong with people? This is highly detestable. This is some ignorant, white trash, low-life, trailer-trash shit. UNACCEPTABLE. And for the NY Post to publish this? For SHAME.

For the actual link to this derogatory sketch, please visit:
http://www.nypost.com/delonas/delonas.htm

I hope this son of a whore die of some horrible venereal disease that painfully rots his dick off slowly. Or be gang-banged by a group of faggots until his rectum is turned inside-out.

I'm out.

Sensual Association

I think it is quite interesting how our brain interprets each of our five senses; mainly, I am fascinated by my brain's association ability when it comes to my sense of smell.

I noticed that before I head over to my cologne counter each morning that, based on what I am wearing that day, I will have an exact idea of which cologne to pick. This morning, I thought about it more and more and realized that there is a common theme for each of my colognes and it's not as random as I thought.

For example - For my everyday, going to work, chino-and-button-down-shirt outfits, I immediate go for my Calvin Klein Eternity; however, if I go the chic and sophisticated route for work, then I aim for my Vera Wang. During the weekends that I go grocery shopping, a quiet stroll around the community or just anything sporty, I pick Hugo Boss.
And on the rare occassions that I do step out and attend a social event, I either go with the Man de Rocha or my Issey Miyake; clubbing and bar-hopping nights always point to my Jean Paul Gaultier.

So, as you can see, I am very specific about my cologn, but just why is that? Do I associate the scent with the outfit or do I link more of the brand to the social event? Or both? I think I may have gotten this from my mother. Growing up, her vanity is filled with more than 50 or 60 bottles of perfume, every single one lined up and dusted immaculately to showoff each display bottle. At first, I thought she liked them because of the bottle designs, but with time, I began to notice that the perfumes she wears has a pattern. For example, when she goes to work, she usually wears Elizabeth Arden's Red Door or True Love. When she attends social events and galas, she would wear her Chanel No. 5 or No. 19 and on regular shopping trips, I think Opium or Tresor by Lancome , but that I'm not sure because that depends largely on her moods, and trust me, she has many, many moods like the phases of the moon.

And now, I can see a large resemblance in my sister; she's at the age now where she cares deeply how she looks, smells...etc. and her perfume collection, in turn, is expanding exponentially.

So just what is it about our olfactory perception that plays such a huge part in our decision making, not to mention triggering certain memories? I think it is amazing what our five senses are capable of.

Random Thought #9873249

Growing up in a bi-cultural environment was tough, really tough. When kids would go out and play after school, I was being shipped to violin lessons or SAT prep classes; when kids got to spend the night at their friends' houses for sleep-overs, I had to stay home and study; when kids were applauded for getting a 95% on their quizzes and tests, I was constantly asked where the extra 5 points had gone. It wasn't easy.

Granted, growing up part Traditional Chinese did have its perks, such as great food, strict manners and red packs. Yes, the red packs made a year-long of belittling, strict disciplinary actions and harsh punishments all worth while.

After graduating high school and moving to Washington, DC., for college, I thought to myself, "finally, I can have my freedom and experience that part of childhood I have never had." While I had lived that proclamation to its fullest, I still felt trapped, but why?

Then while riding on the metro going to work today, it dawned on me. The hardest part about growing up in a multi-cultural family is not the clash of cultures we experience when we lived at home, no; the hardest part comes after that - it comes when we have entered the real world and trying to break those traditions attempting to assimilate; the time when you need to differentiate the good and the bad about both cultures and combine only the good. We can no longer only, at this point, blame our parents saying that, "they wouldn't let me do this," or "they wouldn't let me do that; therefore I am the way that I am today." No, The decision rests solely on our own judgments. We can no longer say, "I had no choice," and I believe taking responsibilities for the first time in your life is the hardest part.

But then again, you can say that about a whole lot of other stuff.

Gay Marriage

Time stamp - 9:30am and I am already bitter and angry, why? Because gays cannot be legally wed. The more I think about this issue, the angrier I get because, simply put, it is just not fair.

I started out not really caring about the same-sex marriage issue because to me, growing up in a tumultuous family, marriage is nothing more than a business transaction. I have always thought if the love is there, why get married? But now I sing a different tune and march to a different beat. I believe in marriage, any marriage, straight, bi, gay, whatever, I believe in it and I want to take the next step to the next level, but I can't. And why? Because gays can't get married officially.

I truly don't give two shits and a flying fuck about the piece of paper saying that we're married, BUT I do want to have a legal ceremony and have all the benefits automatically awarded to married couples; I want to be able to visit my boyfriend/finacee in the hospital without having to previously sign a costly Power of Attorney; I want to be able to have kids without going through a pricey joint-custody procedure. I want to be able to do all of this stuff without having to dull out more cash to Uncle Sam who does jack-shit to secure our welfare just because we're "different".

Jonathan and I have been together for a little over three and a half years and we were engaged this past January. After ten months of being engaged, I want to be married. Technically, we could get married, but that is all in our heads; only we will be able to acknowlegde the legitimacy of the marriage, nobody else....

I'm just frustrated and I'm angry. Everywhere I turn, every fuckin' hickass Tom, redneck Dick, and prostitute Sally are getting married; everyone, but us. It is just upsetting.

I guess all we can do is wait, which is, sometimes, a terrible thing.

Blind...Decorating for the seeing?

Okay, what?! So as I'm channel surfing one Sunday afternoon, I came across what seemed like an interesting design show (come on, what gay guy doesn't secretly love interior design shows on TLC?). But the more I got into the show, the more I was perplexed by the sunglasses-wearing man being led by his seeing-eye assistant pointing to this and that and feeling all around, and then it dawned on me - the entire premise of the show is about interior design by a visually challenged person. Okay, hold up.

While I respect blind people and believe that all handicaps deserve equal treatment, there are several professions that I do not believe they should be in for safety (or asthetics reasons) and grouped in a list with cab-driver, hydrolics-crane operator and neurosurgeon, is interior designer.

This whole concept is EXTREMELY foreign and strange to me. Who would trust a blind man to design their house? I mean, would you trust an armless man to carry your grocery or a paraplegic to teach you how to ride a bike? Parallel to the concept of "never trust a skinny chef", I would never trust a blind designer. If beauty is in the EYE of the beholder, and the bitch is blind......... 'nough said.

Come on TLC, I trusted you to bring me interesting shows such as Trading Spaces, and What Not To Wear, but this gimmicky crap? That is just degrading for blind people everywhere. And when I heard the blind "designer" say, "I feel a strong presence for yellow here," ooooo, I wanted to yell, "Motherfucker, I trust Ms. Cleo more with that bullshit than your lying ass; at least she's got ESP AND a set of fully functional eyes!"

Blocked....

I'm feeling a bit unwitty and unoriginal these days thus the reason behind why I have not posted anything new. And today is not to be an exception. But to keep my avid reader(s) entertain, I will, however, include this link to an amazing process of aluminum foil making. It is quite fascinating.

Enjoy while I get my wit back.

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/243702/how_to_make_foil/

Holy....Crapulence?

Crapulence is a word? What?

It means sick from gross excess in drinking or eating.

Now I have heard everything!

Riedel Amadeo Lyra Decanter

So I stumbled across this BEAUTIFUL decanter and I decided this piece must be shared amongst decanter-enthusiasts throughout. But with a hefty price-tag of $250, this shit better do more than air your wine; it better fuckin' be Jesus and turn regular tap water into a bottle of Château Branne-Mouton Bordeaux circa 1784....

Product Review - Nike+ iPod Sports Kits

In recent months, Nike collaborated with Apple and unveiled an entire line of iPod nano-compatible running gear called the Nike+. The entire line is aimed to integrate listening to music and running seamlessly.

The Nike+ Sports kit ($29 at niketown.com or apple.com/store) comes with a sensor that goes in your shoes and a transmitter that connects to your iPod Nano. The sensor transmits information such as distance, time, and calories burned directly to your iPod Nano and ultimately syncs effortlessly to your iTunes application and then automatically sends that information to nikeplus.com where you can track your progress online to see your runs, set goals, and challenge friends.

So giving into temptation, I bought it to help me train for my annual Rockville 10K and it has worked great. It is rather a novel invention. Not only can you listen to your tunes, but at specific intervals, a voice of your choice (male or female) will alert you of your progress so you will always be able to stay on top of your goals. The sensor and the transmitter are both the size of a quarter which makes carrying around hassle-free. Ideally, Nike wants you to put the sensor in their Nike+ specific shoes where there is a slot built-in for optimal performance and accuracy. However, not knowing if I will completely enjoy the line or not, I opted against purchasing shoes that I may not wear again. And Nike is not known to make comfortable running shoes so I decided to keep training with my New Balance and the results, I think, is comparable, if not 100% accurate.

So you slip the sensor towards the center bottom of one your shoes, connect the transmitter to you iPod Nano (the same slot you plug your USB cord into), and you're good to go. Pretty much everything is voice-guided so it makes getting use-to a breeze. Not a lot of calibrating is needed, but for more accurate recording, you might consider it; again, I decided to go "au natural".

To start my training, I set my workout to be based on time (you have a choice of doing your training based on Basic, Time, Distance or Calories Burned) and I set it to 20 minutes. After choosing my playlist to run to, a voice comes on alerting me the start of the run. At every 5 minute-interval, the voice will come back on alerting me how long I have gone and how much time is left to the end of my workout without pausing my music. And at the end of the workout, after pressing to end workout, your total progress (time, distance, calories burned, approx. time per mile) will be spoken to you and if a personal best is beat, provided that there are previous workouts to compare to, Lance Armstrong will congratulate you! Isn't that neat?

Once my workout was completed, I excitedly took my nano and plugged it into my computer to sync the information to my iTunes. This is the tricky and somewhat hard part. To prevent runners from cheating on their personal workouts, goals or challenges, Nike designed the synchronization to be a one-shot deal, meaning if you are unsuccessful in syncing it the first time, the information, though will be stored in your iPod and your iTunes, will not be sent to Nikeplus.com. Oh, and you have to sync your iPod within 24 hours or else the data, again, will not be sent to Nikeplus.com. I was very frustrated at first, but being on the phone with Nike's technician, I can understand the logic behind it.

All in all, I am very happy and impressed with this piece of invention; I think I am on my way of running the 10K in less that 50 minutes this year (fingers crossed) and with the help of the Nike+ iPod Sports Kit, I am well on my way.

If you are an avid runner, or just someone trying to improve your physique, give this little gadget a try. If you don't like it, at $29, it is not likely to break your piggy-bank.

DC Circulator

This post probably does not apply to anyone not living (or working) in the immediate DC Metropolitan Golden Triangle area. However, if you do plan on visiting DC in the future, then it's something useful to keep in mind.

I can't stress how much I love the DC Circulator. It is, basically, a bus. But not one of those nasty, homeless, poor people Metro-Transit buses... oh HELLLLLL NO; on the contrary, it's a very nice, pretty bus that takes me from my work to Georgetown shopping area in less than 10 minutes. Before the invention of the DC Circulator, I couldn't get to Georgetown unless I took a cab for $15 or take the metro and then walk about a mile. The DC Circulator does not just serves as my personal shopping chauffer, no; It's many lines offer tourists and residents a variety of places to visit that are otherwise out of the way, even for regular buses and the metro. Oh, not to mention, it's only $1.

So next time you are in town, check this out: The DC Circulator. It's worth it!

The Spirit of New York and the American people...

Shall Prevail.

In recently weeks, I have been rudely accosted with images, sound bytes and video clips of that one faithful day in American history when many dreams shattered, families torn apart and Patriotism restored - and the day that all of us have etched in our hearts forever is September 11th, 2001.

I was growing increasingly frustrated and upset by these constant reminders of this unfortunate event and working at the Associated Press makes escaping these imagery a task close to impossible to achieve. "After 5 years, we're still dwindling on this bullshit," I thought to myself. Insensitive? Yes, to say the least; I was numb. I became almost indifferent because no matter where I turned, haunting images were everywhere.

But on the day of the anniversary, my heart re-opened. I realize that I was trying to forget what had happened to my beloved city, my home. I was trying to wish that it had never happened and if there are no reminders of the event, then, perhaps, I can close my eyes and say to myself, "It was only a dream." But on this day, I realize that these images were not rude relics of so many lives lost, but symbol of hope and faith. Like a Phoenix born from the ashes of destruction, so are the spirits of the American people. We are more united than we have ever been since WWII, and we have not been stronger, individually and collectively. We believe in the American ways, and each and everyone of us alive on this day celebrates Democracy with ever burning fervor. From that one faithful day, we learned that we are blessed.

To all those who lost someone, our hearts and prayers go out to you and your families. God Bless all of us.

Yummy Goodness

And by yummy goodness, I mean disgusting rancid putrid smell. Why? Because I just farted and it stinks. That offensive odor to my olfactory organ instantly prompted this entry.

I have noticed that usually, barring the occassional Toca Bell and Juanita's Restaurant visits, my farts do not smell; however, my office bends that rule completely. I have never encountered a fart in my office that didn't have me immediately reaching for the nearest of the three room sprays strategically scattered around my desk. Why is that? Do I step into another dimension of reality, into the planes of effluvium when I enter my office? Or does my nose become simultaneously sharper rivaling that of a bloodhound? There's something about this office that either heightens my olfactory modality or magnifies the redolence of my gaseous excretion. Either way, I'm dying as I sit here typing away, wallowing in my own vaporous nastiness.

I think I need a shower after this.

Confession of a Coffee Addict

Well, I supose I have no right in calling myself a coffee addict considering the fact that I only started drinking coffee approximately two months ago. When one thinks of "addiction", or rather, when I think of "addiction", an image of a cracked out, hand-shaking, bags-under-your-eyes person who's been hooked for longer than six months comes to mind. Being addicted for two months, that is a pussy-sissy addiction. But holding true to my sexual preference and my nelly-ness, I declare myself, officially, addicted to coffee.

I first started drinking coffee because eating Doritos and devouring large amount of candy no longer do the trick of giving me a good afternoon pick-me-up buzz; I became cranky, mean and extremely lazy; in return, my productivity suffered greatly. Fearing that I may loose my job (haha, I laugh), I turned to something that I have always been grotesquely against - drinking coffee. Not only did I believe drinking coffee will one day make your heart explode, but, more importantly, it stains your teeth. It is bad enough that I suck down cancer sticks like a furnace, but drinking coffee also?? My teeth would turn British.

But after weeks and months of fighting the temptation, I finally gave in - I decided making ends meet was more important than keeping my teeth white, so I started to drink coffee. OOOoooo weeeee! Not only is my heart palpitating at an amazing speed, but I became a nicer person and lazy afternoons became a breeze.

So to summarize - here are the benefits of consuming large quantities of coffee:

1. Longer lasting happiness than a typical sugar rush
2. Facial muscles that control your smiles go right to work making you look much friendlier
3. Heart palpitation gives you the cardio workout to keep you skinny
4. You feel less hungry, similar effect to that of speed
5. A cup of coffee a day slows down the progression of Alzheimer's Disease (this is scientifically true, by the way)

Now, I drink two cups of coffee a day just to keep me smiling through the day, not to mention making me crystal-meth skinny. Well done.

Adidas Adilette

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Take a look at this; take a good look at this. These sandals have been the bane of my existence for the past week and a half. Well, in actuality, the escapade of finding these sandals was the nuisance, but fret no more because I have found them, at the Adidas store in Georgetown (who knew).

I have been looking for these sandals for forever and day and every store that I've been to either didn't carry them, or just plainly didn't have my size. I was furious.

But alert the media because Howard has found them and he can wear them to this house party tonight as planned. Yay! Well done!

That is all.

PS - In case you are wondering, my life is generally so uninteresting that I consider these minute everyday achievements of self-indulgences to be monumental events rivaling that of Homer's Odyssey.

What the F?

Moments ago, leading astronomers declared Pluto to be a planet no more. Yes, you heard right: Pluto, the "Pizza" in our familiar childhood acronym, is no longer a planet. I mean, really? How are kids, nowadays, suppose to remember the order of the planets? "My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nine"...that shit don't make sense, nor is it appetizing enough to remember...

In addition, ponder on this - if astronomers, the social and the intellectual elites of the geek/nerd world, can be wrong, how certain can we be of everything else?!?!?

I'm flabbergasted

Surprise, surprise...

People continue to surprise me. Last night, one of our friends, Tom, came over to hang out because he was leaving for Spain to teach English in a couple of weeks. In between packing up his entire life and seeing those he cared about, this would be our last chance to see him. He is more Jonathan's friend than mine, though we were on the same Cheerleading Team together and have swam together during our Freshmen Year.

I was hesitant at first when Jonathan told me that Tom was coming over; I expected the night to be extremely awkward. Let me explain a little something about Tom. Tom is practically the antithesis of me: he is not clean, he has dreads....long story short, Tom's a hippie. I didn't think I could talk to him about much.

While we were on the Cheerleading Team together, we became very close and have had many in-depth conversations, but, at the same time, I was heavily "medicated" during that part of my college years so striking a conversation was not exactly hard; I could have had a deep, meaningful conversation with a brick wall at that point, I was so baked. And since Tom no longer drinks and I stopped doing drugs a few years back, I was terrified to actually having a sober conversation with him. Was it going to be weird? Would we have things to talk about it? Would we find each other boring? Doubts became frequent visitors in my mind. For two days I brooded over this issue and have contemplated asking Jonathan to take him out to dinner instead of bringing him back home. But because Tom is a great friend of Jonathan's, I decided to keep my mouth shut, and Tom surprised me. Heck, I surprised myself. We ended up having a great time, had great conversations and Tom stayed overnight. As a matter of fact, Tom is actually still sleeping on our couch as I'm writing this.

I realize something: I am extremely quick to judge people, sizing them up and down by their appearances, their expressions, their mannerisms...etc. But what can I do? I grew up in an Asian household; it was expected of you to be judgmental. I guess to overcome that is to force myself into situations where I would initially feel awkward. Hmmm...confronting your fears...how original....

A Moment of Silence.....

So can we PLEASE, right here, right now, devote a minute or two to discuss how RETARDED America is? Yes, America...

So for those of you who watch So You Think You Can Dance, aka the BEST show in the world, religiously know that we, Team Travis, were robbed of a $100,000 victory for our main man, Travis Wall, last night during the Finale. Travis is not only the cutest thing ever to grace this side of the hemisphere, and has techniques that would make even the greatest of dance legions such as Alvin Ailey blush (okay, maybe that was bit of an over-inflated statement), most importantly, Mr. Travis, aka Amazing to every essence of the word, has the personality and unforgetable charisma to add to the long list of wonderfulness. Travis is the total package! I mean just look at this precious face....

So why did Benji win the $100,000 prize money, a one-year contract with Celine Dion's dance troupe in Las Vegas, and something, something, blah blah blah? I'll tell you why - Because America is stupid. The same people that put Clay Gay-kin on top of the Billboard charts are probably also responsible for cheating Travis and America out of a rightfully deserved victory with machines that are able to dial up to 1,500 calls a minute blowing up the phone lines while the honest Team Travis sits diligently dialing each number with hope that Travis would win, as he should have had.

Besides, Benji needs to come out of the closet. Hey, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying a gay man shouldn't win this competition, fuck no. It's a dance competition, for goodness sake, of course a gay man should win. And I think a gay man has, but Benji (yeah, Benji...why would a self-proclaimed "straight" male want to be called "Benji" voluntarily?) needs to come out of the closet because we know he's gay, he knows he's gay now he just needs to know that we know that he knows that we know he's gay. Closets are for hanging clothes, not for hanging out.

So as you can see by my rants and raves that I am quite furious at the results of last night's show, to say the least. I know cursing at the TV, throwing shit and flaring around gayly, but angrily, would do nothing to sway the result of the show, but it sure made this little queer happy. Oh and for the sake of all humanity, I hope that being a year with the Celine Dion dance troupe would allow Benji to come to terms with his inner "faggotry" and come out; because he needs to and it's Celine Dion.

Good DAY!

I am back.....

To my avid reader(s),

After much going back and forth trying to come up a decision where to keep my blog, I have decided to come back to Blogspot for good; it's much easier to use than the .Mac one. .Mac account will still have my photos and stuff, so feel free to check that out from time to time, but this the place where I will keep my rants and raves and the occassional gossips!!

See you all here soon.

xoxo
Howard

I Have Moved On.....

I have finally moved my blog, and my photos...etc, to a new location; Please add this to your bookmark....I am officially .Mac!

http://web.mac.com/momolife

I will most likely lose majority of my posts on here, however, I will try to move the archives into my new site, but I don't know if that will happen any time soon, or ever.

But check out my site, it's pretty awesome, if I may say so myself ;)

Loves and kisses!

你們聊我先走了

小兔說："我媽媽叫我小兔兔，好聽！"
小豬說："我媽媽叫我小豬豬，也好聽！"
小狗說："我媽媽叫我小狗狗，也很好聽！"
小雞說："你們聊，我先走了！"

小兔說："我是兔娘養的！"
小豬說："我是豬娘養的！"
小雞說："我是雞娘養的！"
小狗說："你們聊，我先走了！"

浪客說："人們叫我浪人，好聽！"
武士說："人們叫我武人，也好聽！"
高手說："人們叫我高人，也很好聽！"
劍客說："你們聊，我先走了！"

李宗仁將軍說："我這人，有仁！"
傅作義將軍說："我這人，有義！"
左權將軍說："我這人，有權！"
霍去病將軍說："你們聊，我先走了！"

老張家的門是柳木做的，老張說："我家的門是木門"
老李家的門是塑料做的，老李說："我家的門是塑門"
老王家的門是磚頭做的，老王說："我家的門是磚門"
老劉家的門是鋼做的，老劉說："你們聊，我先走了！"

National Anthem in....Espanol?!?!

How do I feel about it? This pretty much sums it up....

I agree with President Bush.....yeah, 'nough said.

When asked how he felt about our National Athem sung in Spanish, President Bush replied, "I think the National Anthem of the Unites States ought to be sung in English. I think the immigrants who want to become American citizens should learn English and sing the National Anthem in English."

Aaahhhh.....it's like a breathe of fresh air. Most sensible thing President Bush has said and I couldn't agree more!

Like those 3 for $10 T-shirts say, "Welcome to America, now learn to speak English."